Drop the Rock in Your Recovery From Addiction: What Does It Mean?

What you will learn

• The concept of "dropping the rock" comes from a story about swimmers carrying heavy rocks while trying to reach an island of sobriety.
• The practice relates specifically to Steps Six and Seven of AA's Twelve Steps, focusing on identifying and releasing character defects.
• Dropping the rock is crucial because it addresses underlying issues that fuel addiction, including trauma, shame, and defensive behaviors.
• These burdens typically include resentment, perfectionism, shame, fear of vulnerability, people-pleasing, denial, trauma, and toxic relationships.
• The journey of releasing these burdens happens slowly over time, requiring patience and consistent practice rather than an immediate transformation.
• Treatment centers offer structured environments and comprehensive care for those needing additional help in identifying and releasing their rocks.

The metaphor of “dropping the rock” stands as a powerful symbol of recovery, representing the act of releasing deep-seated character defects, resentments, and destructive patterns that weigh down the spirit. For those in recovery, this concept goes far beyond its simple imagery – it speaks to the profound transformation that occurs when someone chooses to let go of the burdens they’ve carried throughout their addiction.

Understanding and embracing the practice of dropping the rock opens the door to lasting change and authentic recovery, allowing people to move forward unburdened by the weight of their past.

What Does ‘Dropping the Rock’ Mean?

The phrase “dropping the rock” originates from a book by Bill P. and Todd Weber about people swimming to an island of sobriety.[1] As they swim, they clutch rocks representing their defects of character – pride, fear, self-pity, and resentment. Many struggle to stay afloat while desperately holding onto these rocks, not realizing that letting go would make their journey infinitely easier. The metaphor teaches that recovery becomes possible only when people release these self-defeating behaviors and thought patterns.

In Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) meetings and recovery circles, dropping the rock specifically relates to Steps Six and Seven of the Twelve Steps in the Big Book, which focus on becoming ready to release character defects and humbly asking for help in removing shortcomings.[2] This process requires honest self-reflection, a willingness to change, and the courage to face life without old coping mechanisms. Through AA meetings, counseling, support groups, and personal work, people learn to identify their rocks and develop the trust necessary to finally let them go.

Why Is This Important in Addiction Recovery?

The act of dropping the rock serves as a crucial turning point in addiction recovery as it addresses the underlying issues that often fuel addictive behaviors. Many people enter recovery carrying the immense weight of past traumas, toxic shame, and deeply ingrained defense mechanisms that initially served as protection but eventually became barriers to healing. These emotional and psychological burdens not only complicate the recovery process but can also trigger relapse when left unaddressed.

When someone actively works to identify and release their rocks, they create space for personal growth, emotional healing, and authentic connections with others. Therapists, addiction specialists, and recovery coaches often emphasize that sustained recovery requires more than just abstaining from substances – it demands a fundamental shift in how someone relates to themselves and the world around them. This internal transformation becomes possible only when people are willing to examine their rocks honestly and begin the gradual process of letting them go.

What Are Some Examples?

Understanding what constitutes a “rock” helps people in recovery identify and address their own burdens. While these rocks can take many forms, recognizing common examples allows people to begin the process of self-examination and release:

• Resentment and grudges: Holding onto past hurts, betrayals, and anger toward others or oneself prevents emotional healing and growth.
• Perfectionism and control: Maintaining unrealistic standards and attempting to manage every aspect of life rather than accepting things as they are.
• Shame and self-judgment: Carrying deep-seated feelings of unworthiness, inadequacy, or being fundamentally flawed.
• Fear of vulnerability: Maintaining emotional walls and avoiding authentic connections due to fear of being hurt or rejected.
• People-pleasing behaviors: Constantly seeking approval from others while neglecting personal needs and boundaries.
• Denial and rationalization: Refusing to acknowledge personal responsibility or making excuses for harmful behaviors.
• Past trauma: Carrying unprocessed emotional wounds that continue to influence current behaviors and relationships.
• Toxic relationships: Maintaining connections with people who undermine recovery or trigger unhealthy patterns.

Dropping Your Rock(s)

The journey of dropping your rocks begins with one simple yet profound truth: you don’t have to carry these burdens anymore. Recovery opens the door to releasing what no longer serves you, but like any meaningful change, this process happens one day, one rock at a time. As you move forward in your recovery, remember that letting go doesn’t mean forgetting – it means choosing your freedom and well-being over old, familiar pain.

Start by identifying your heaviest rock. Perhaps it’s the shame that’s kept you isolated, the resentment that burns your peace away, or the perfectionism that never lets you rest. Work with your counselor, sponsor, or recovery mentor to examine this burden honestly. Pay attention to when it feels heaviest, what triggers you to grip it tighter, and most importantly, imagine who you could become without its weight.

Remember that dropping your rocks doesn’t happen in one dramatic moment. Some days, you might find yourself picking them back up, as this is normal and part of the process. What matters is your willingness to keep practicing release. You’ll gradually develop the trust and courage needed to let go through therapy, support groups, meditation, journaling, or whatever tools resonate with you. Your hands were meant to hold connection and joy, not the rocks of your past. As you release each burden, you make space for the full, rich life that recovery promises.

What If I Need More Help?

A recovery center such as Ascendant offers comprehensive support for people who need additional help dropping their rocks and maintaining sobriety. These treatment facilities provide structured environments where people can focus entirely on their recovery journey, surrounded by experienced addiction specialists, therapists, and support staff who understand the complexities of letting go.

At professional treatment centers, people receive personalized care plans that may include individual therapy, group counseling, trauma-informed care, and holistic healing approaches. These programs help identify deep-rooted rocks while providing the tools and support needed to release them safely. Medical doctors, psychiatrists, and counselors work together to address both the physical and emotional aspects of recovery, ensuring that people have the comprehensive support they need to heal.

If you’re struggling to drop your rocks alone, reaching out for professional help shows courage, not weakness. Treatment centers offer various levels of care, from residential treatment to outpatient programs, allowing you to find the right fit for your needs. Contact Ascendant to learn more about their programs, verify your insurance coverage, and take the next step in your recovery journey.

Start Your Recovery Today

It’s never too late to release the burdens that hold you back from experiencing true peace and fulfillment. Ascendant New York is ready to help you identify and release your rocks through evidence-based therapy, compassionate support, and proven recovery techniques.

Amanda is a prolific medical content writer specializing in eating disorders and addiction treatment. She graduated Magna Cum Laude from Purdue University with a B.S. in Social Work. Read more